Is Food Your Emotional Bandaid? And Why Menopause Can Make It Worse.

Emotional eating is probably the most misunderstood of all eating behaviours. It’s blamed for cookie cravings, late night ice cream binges, and bags of chips consumed after a bad break-up. But what’s really going on?

First, let’s be clear: there is nothing “wrong” with emotional eating. It doesn’t make you a bad person, nor does it say anything about your will power, desire to be healthy or ability to have a healthy relationship with food.

The only thing it tells us is that you are wired to avoid pain and seek pleasure, just like every human being on earth.

When we eat something that tastes good, or makes us feel good while eating it (hello grandma’s apple pie), our brain releases dopamine, the neurotransmitter that activates reward and pleasure. In other words, we are hard wired to regulate our mood with food, along with other pleasurable things. And the more often this happens, the stronger the response and reward.

So, now that we understand why food feels good, what do we do about? It comes down to 3 questions:

WHY

As I explained above, eating feels good. And when we respond to strong feelings with food, we reinforce that reward pathway in our brain.

Avoid pain (strong feeling) and seek pleasure (food that you enjoy)

It basically becomes an automatic thought and requires intention to change our response. Not restriction, but self-compassionate intention. More on that below…

WHERE

Sometimes we’re triggered to avoid pain/seek pleasure in certain situations. In my work with women who are learning to eat intuitively, we talk about how certain people, places or situations can trigger emotional hunger. Parents may find that the end of the day (is it bedtime yet?)triggers emotional hunger. Workplace triggers can include Monday morning meetings, deadlines or certain co-workers. Or, maybe you feel emotional hunger when you’re around certain family members.

WHAT ELSE

We’re not wired to tolerate discomfort! Our brain will go to great lengths to avoid pain, and thus will default to the fastest and easiest way to seek pleasure. And for many people, food is an easy choice. And there’s nothing wrong with that. In that moment, it’s self-care. But, if you feel like you want to learn how to respond to your emotional hunger in other ways, here are a few suggestions to get you started:

  • Walk, don’t run when you feel strong feelings. Our brain wants us to run away from painful emotions and will suggest quick and easy ways to do that. But remember, these are well-worn paths based on past experiences. They’re not always conscious thoughts, and just because they happen automatically doesn’t mean they’re the only or best choice. So, instead of running towards that automatic thought, take a walk with it. In intuitive eating, we call this “practice not reacting”, but it can apply to any situation. Reassure yourself that you’re not going to die by not responding to this feeling right away, even if it feels like it.

  • Become your own coach and talk yourself through the think-feel-act cycle. Thoughts become feelings, which in turn drive our actions. Most of the time this cycle is on auto-pilot. But, you can learn to understand and redirect your thoughts and feelings into actions that feel better. Take what you learn from your WHY and WHERE answers and see what you can change.

  • Make a list of other things that bring you pleasure. I often suggest making a list of “quick pleasures” that you can reach for when you’re trying to “practice not reacting”. These should be quick, easy and accessible things like making a cup of tea, calling a friend, reading, gardening, walking, etc. It can even be a hug from someone you love! With time, you can build up a list of things that help you to seek pleasure when you’re faced with strong feelings.

What’s the link to Menopause?

We’ve talked about dopamine, but serotonin is another one of our “feel good” neurotransmitters. It’s been linked to anxiety and depression, but it has a more intimate connection to women because of the hormone estrogen.

Our levels of serotonin are closely related to estrogen. As estrogen goes up and down, so does serotonin. Not a big deal if this is happening on a predictable pattern, like our menstrual cycle.

But, when we enter perimenopause (the 5+ years before menopause), estrogen levels can fluctuate wildly. Even before periods become irregular, estrogen can fluctuate from month to month, meaning that symptoms (including moods) can also fluctuate. And that’s not even taking into consideration stress, which can play a big role in our emotional hunger.

Less serotonin = lower mood = drive to avoid pain and seek pleasure.


Intuitive Eating, Perimenopause, MenopauseJenn HuberEmotional Eating, Intuitive Eating, Perimenopause, Menopause, MoodComment